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“Trad” Wives: Nostalgic Beauty or Repressive Patriarchy?

  • Christabel Ashun
  • Dec 18, 2024
  • 3 min read
By: Christabel Ashun

In the 1900s, the image of a "traditional wife" was widely romanticized–a woman frolicking through a field with two children, a baby in her arms. She is pregnant and dutifully cooks and cleans for her "traditional breadwinner husband". He's the idealized hardworking, meat-hunting, "Chad" archetype who provides for the family, while his wife maintains the home. The concept of a traditional family focuses on women being submissive homemakers and caregivers. Now, in 2024, this nostalgic dream of the nuclear family is still the ideal life for some, but it's far from the full truth.


Men who long for a return to the "good old days", even though they never experienced it and only know it as a concept, often see it as a restoration of masculine power and privilege, blaming modern feminism for "stealing" their future wives. On the other hand, women who aspire to be “trad wives”, often desire an escape from the demands of modern labor, workplace gender inequality, and the societal expectations of them performing domestic labor while still working. The fantasy of traditional lifestyles dismisses the terrible realities of history. The "golden age" of traditional lifestyles is nowhere near as idyllic as it's portrayed by these people. In the 1900s, women's roles as housewives were notably marked by domestic and sexual violence, financial exploration, and drug addiction. The emotional and physical labor they provided, cooking, cleaning, raising children, and assuming roles as therapists, went completely unpaid. Women who desire this lifestyle dream of wealth, not work.


But, when traditional lifestyles are discussed, they seem to almost never include women of color. Outside the Western world, women have been forced to be traditional wives from childhood and adhere to patriarchal standards that restrict them from a right to work, get an education, or even speak to each other despite some women claiming the values of a traditional wife are a great thing. That is because this idealization of traditional lifestyle goes hand in hand with fascism. In Nazi Germany, women were also expected to have large families as the children would uphold the extreme ideologies of their leaders as fact. Putin, the dictator of Russia is also currently encouraging women to have as many children as possible and protect traditional family beliefs. 


Being a traditional wife is not inherently wrong, for some women, it aligns with their choices. However, it is important to know the risk involved when completely depending on somebody else. That includes financial dependence, isolation, or even one’s whole life down the drain in the event of divorce or abuse. But of course, I can't stop you, just don't be surprised when your millionaire husband buys you an egg holder instead of the tickets to Greece you’ve been dreaming of.

Nara Smith and Lucky Blue Bring Their Kids to Hannah Neeleman's Viral Ballerina Farm in Utah: 'The Best Day'
Nara Smith and Lucky Blue Bring Their Kids to Hannah Neeleman's Viral Ballerina Farm in Utah: 'The Best Day'

Nara Smith and her husband, Lucky Blue Smith visit another traditional lifestyle creator Hanah Neeleman’s, and the owner of JetBlue. They are both creators with massive platforms.


BIBLIOGRAPHY:


"Putin Calls for Women To Work and Have 'Many Children' As Birth Rate Falls"


"Russia bans 'child-free propaganda' to try to boost birth rate"


"Russia bans 'child-free propaganda' to try to boost birth rate"


"Nara Smith and Lucky Blue Bring Their Kids to Hannah Neeleman's Viral Ballerina Farm in Utah: 'The Best Day'"


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